Be Kind Rewind

I feel kind of nothing today... It has been a nice day but I don't have a focus from today so I don't know what to write about.

We started spring cleaning this morning and then took an old loaf of bread and some nuts to Tehidy where we fed various birds and the occasional squirrel. Last ime we were there, there were many squirrels around but I think most of them were sleeping today. At the sight of a walnut or hazelnut you could see their excitement and they would come and take it from your hand. I also fed the swans by hand to try and limit how much the gulls got. There were some beautiful adolescent swans that still had many of their dark feathers.

At home I had a nice long bath with a book and then made up some soup from turkey stock and left overs from a roast. This is only something I have learnt to do recently. I have for a years been throwing away excellent stock because I had no idea it was stock! I thought it was fat. Now that I keep it, it is obvious how little fat there is in it, because it comes to the surface. I also have been nervous to use leftovers as I have never been sure how long you can keep them for etc.

My family feeds scraps to the dogs but I find that mine tend to get a little whiffy if I do that. I am sure my Mum knows how to cook up scraps but it is another skill I didn't manage to pick up while living at home. Although I would help my Mum cook, I just did individual tasks as directed. Cooking a full meal is a very differeny skill. I still struggle with meals with multiple parts. F does all the roasts in our family (and very well he does them to!).

On the surface there is very little spiritual about my day. However it is the right time to spring clean. Reading my Llewellyn's calendar (Xmas pressie) for January there is an article on setting up a household shrine and Hestia, a Greek Goddess of the home. Cooking for family and feeding wild animals on a cold day in the middle of winter are also activities with a certain something to them as well...

Maybe the problem isn't with the spiritualness of my day but with the way I have perceived it. If it was a good day, then why do I feel sad this evening? Maybe it is the future than concerns me. Soon F will return to work and I shall possibly still have no job and an uncertain future. I work in admin but have qualifications to do more. Everyone has an uncertain future, it's just I feel very aware of that this evening. I guess I don't feel nothing then really.